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Head Quarters M Laws Divn.
My dear Sister Cynt. Aug 11. 1863.
I received your most welcome letter this
morning & wrote at once to Uncle Alex Seddon & will send the communication off by the morning
mail. You [?] in reply to it
of two months ago. Have you not recieved one of much later date? I wrote to you as soon as I heard of Bland's strange & startling act and have not eagerly looked for a reply. You convey however in the letter just recieved the information I chiefly sought-for I write in the earnest desire to know what your feelings & course wd be in the matter. I am glad to see that you acted as I wd have wished, so far at least as I can judge from what you tell me without having seen your letter to Bland.
I am indeed sorry that she has not replied to your letter,
but am quite sure she has now done so, & hope it was her speedy departure Gloucester rather than any intention to slight you, which prevented her responding more promptly.
We agree verly closelymy dear sister in many of our
views & I dare say your letter was very much like mine. Whilst expressing my poignant sorrow at the step she had taken, and my astonishment that she wd have I am so without consulting either her
husband, her mother or yourself. I told her likewise
thay if the new faith she prefers, & adopted with such
apparent earnestness, and in the face of such opportunity
really wrought a change in her life & character, it
might perhaps in the end have reason no longer to
grieve at her choice, but I told her frankly that
unless that change did take place, or if I had
reason to suppose she was captivated by the other forms
of religion & not really moved by its holier spirit, and
that disregarding the happiness of her family & friends
she had thoughtfully or carefully gone counter to their
wishes in so serious a point, she would have added
the [?] to my misery
I trust that however erroneous her views she has been
actiavted by a conscientious belief. It is deeply mortifying
to me & must be to you all, to think that Bland would have
concealed her wishes or purpose from us , whilst she confided
in, sought consul of & heartened to, those whose very
society both your mother and myself have mainly tried
to convince her not to cultivate beyond the [?]
of politeness & kindly feeling.
It is indeed mortifying to me that your father's daughter & my
wife shd have as her most intimate friends those so far below
her in social posiitonm, & that they shd obtain such an ascen
dency over her mind as to induce her to desert the
faith in which she has been brought up, plant thorns
in the pillow of her mother & build between her
husband & herself a wall that can not be [?] and
may never be pulled down. It is in vain that I have
tried to reconcile myself to the strange reality. I have prayed
earnestly to God for strength to bear as I shd this mysterious
dispensation. I have reasoned on the subject on the broadest
[?] of Christian charity. I have debated the question in all
its worldly bearings, and still I can come no nearer to
acquiescence in what seems to me an uncomfortable
inflexible, & I almost feel inclined to say unfavorable
act. Had there beenany necessity for haste or secrecy I
might understand it. Had there been any reason for a want
of confidence in me I might excuse it. Had it been a
matter of less serious consequence, even the indiscretion
of youth might have atoned for the thoughtlessness of such
precipitation- but there is nothing of the kind to [?]
the act for I had told Bland a year ago that
if she continued unshaken in her belief & her wishes
after due time for consideration, and inquiry into the
subject, I would not go so far as to face her conscience
or prohibit arbitrarily where i could not influence or
persuade.
After some consideration & a little time for thought she
told me she had been mistaken in her feelings & [?], and often since that, has she [?] me in the very words you quote that she "had gotten over that foolishness." So much for the matter. My only hope, like your [?]
is I must confess a feverish one, & based solely on the
removal from evil influences which have exerted so
great an influence over a young & uninformed mind.
As regards my relations with Bland in every other
particular I have had the greatest reason for [?] [?]. For months she has secured all that all that I could wish, and even I no longer complained that she was undemonstrative, for in her greeting when I saw her, and in the lettersshe sent me, I saw one unmistakable growth of affection & interest
In many respects her characterhas greatly
improved- and I hear from many sources the same testimonial. Never since my marriage despite the trying nature of separation, was i as happy as I have been for the last three or four months, & the sad changed face of which you spoke once more bore its usual [?] of light hearted mirth & happiness , until I received this late unexpected blow.
Her letters, I have received lately, are
still couched in the most affectionate & tender lan- -guange and if professions of love are worth any thing, I am obliged beyond my [?].
She speaks of being in every respect pleasantly
situated at Belleville, of being usefully employed in various ways , and of onlywanting my presence to render her completly happy. This I can not understand because it wd be utterly impossible for me under any circumstances to be so, had I Page 4 continued could [?] to those I love. But people differ. She never mentions now her new faith- and I doubt if she has informed any one of it. I have however, for I do not care chose to conceal the fact, and that the deed is over and is unrevocable. I wd give a great deal to see & talk to you about this & other matters, but I feel it will be a long long time [?] [?] [?] each other again.